No – People Will Never Approve of You

I’ve learned something the past few days.  Something I already knew but often forget because I have such amazing people in my life.

I am a single teen mother, as most of you know.  I get judged constantly for it.  I’d say I’m a pretty damn good mother and am doing my best – but what have I done wrong?

Here, I’ll make a list for you.

  1. I had sex and had a child before marriage.
  2. I had sex and had a child before receiving a complete education (high school & college)
  3. I have received forms of public assistance in order to complete my education, and get a job to get myself on my feet so I can become a productive member of society.
  4. I am getting financial aid to pay for college so I can better myself and my daughter’s lives.
  5. I send my daughter to daycare so that I can work and make a living.

But here’s the thing, and what makes me mad the most.

How do you expect me to take back having sex and having a child before marriage and having a complete education?  Sorry, but life doesn’t have a rewind button.  It just doesn’t – so stop holding that over my head.  You should be happy I’m taking steps to be a productive member of society.

How do you expect me to complete my education without going to school?  Sorry but childcare isn’t free – and don’t suggest online school because I DID try that.

Same thing, how do you expect me to get a job to start getting on my feet without GOING to work?

All I have to say for financial aid is that almost anyone who is able to receive it – uses it.  There’s nothing wrong with that.  Can you pay for college out of pocket?  No?  Exactly.

The last one is just too ridiculous for an explanation.

No matter what I do in life – I could cure cancer – I will ALWAYS be a failure to some people because of ONE thing I did with my at-the-time boy friend.

Thankfully I don’t rely on those people for approval of myself – I don’t rely on anyone for that.

I know I’m doing what I need to do to make a future for myself and my daughter.  Plus NEWSFLASH people I WORK – I PAY THE SAME TAXES AS YOU DO.  I’m paying for that public assistance just like all of you are.

PE

Advertisements

When to Take a Break

I wrote a post a while back about making time for blogging, work, school, and parenting all together.  Each job is so demanding and there’s only 24hrs in the day.

As today is Sunday and Annabelle is at her fathers’ house I thought I’d get some schoolwork done.  To be honest, I have no ambition.  What happens when you have no ambition (or at least when I have no ambition)?  You don’t focus on your work the way you actually want to and should, plus you don’t absorb what you’re trying to.  For me this is the case.

So I decided I needed to take a break today from the crazy world of college.  I know I have things to do, but I also know that right now I’m not in the right frame of mind to be working on class work.

Instead, I’ll be here with you guys 🙂


Do you know when you need a break?  Or deserve one?  Do you actually take the break or push through?  How does that work for you in the end?

What Have I Been Up to?

I hope everyone else is doing great and keeping up with their goals!

I started college this week and here’s a few things I’ve learned:

  • Be at least 30 minutes early to class if you don’t have a very early morning class.  Otherwise, you will have to walk a long ways to get to the school because parking is limited.
  • Ending up sitting in the wrong class on the first day isn’t THAT embarrassing.  Just get up and walk out. Trust me, there will be other kids walking into your classes not knowing where they are either.
  • Notice the closest doors to your classrooms ASAP.  You’ll be thankful when the cold weather hits, or you’re running late.
  • Be at least 10-15 minutes early to class.  No you won’t be the only one there!  
  • COFFEE IS YOUR BEST FRIEND – especially if you have morning classes
  • Cafeteria food looks great, and it’s so exciting to eat “college food” but it’s too expensive!  Bring your own!  Seriously, I didn’t bring food my first day and I had 2 hours between classes that I spent in the cafeteria studying and I was starving!
  • Don’t expect to leave campus for lunch, you won’t get your spot back.  Stay put!
  • Just talk to people!  It’s not that bad.
  • Make sure you get ahead.  You’ll be thankful for it later.
  • Order your books early.  You don’t want to be without your books, or late to classes because you had to wait in that god awful line on the first day.
  • PAY ATTENTION

Okay, it was more than a few!  But hey, that’s how I roll 😉

So far college is going good!  The only part that’s killing me is the reading… SO MUCH READING.  I’m not used to it because we never read our textbooks in high school.  Seriously, I’m not even sure why they bothered buying them.  

Great to be blogging again,

PE

Making Time…

for exercising seems to be my biggest challenge.  

A) I feel like I never have time

B) I feel I have no motivation

I’m trying to get everything together as school begins next week, and quite frankly I’m not good at it.  One of my classes got cancelled so now my schedule is open on Tuesdays and Thursdays.  I’m thinking those will be my workout days but who knows. I wanted to utilize the 2 hours between classes on Monday’s to go work out but now that I have an online class I might have to cut that time out and use it for online class.  Or maybe I’ll use one our to workout and one hour for class?  All the possibilities are endless!  

That brings me to another issue.  I have a hard time thinking of workouts.  I wish there was something out there to give me a workout each day and all I have to do is follow it.  Maybe I’ll look into that.  There probably is something out there, I just haven’t found it. 

Who knows how this will go,

PE

and the Doom Starts Here…

It’s my last week of summer and I have so much to do!  On the brightside I get to pick up my textbooks this week.  School starts next week and I’m pretty psyched!  However, my math class got cancelled so now I’m stuck in a relationships, marriage and family psychology class.  Who knows how THAT will go!  I was pretty bummed to see that none of my medical or science classes were available but I guess I can do that next semester.  

I have my bag all packed and I’m ready for the first day!  I really need to stay on top of things and get awesome grades.  I’m an overachiever as most of you know so I’m shooting for straight A’s.  What do ya think?  Can I do it?  Let’s see!

That’s it for now,

PE

Student Loans & FAFSA – Complete Crap

I have applied and registered for classes at a community college recently.  I will be transferring to the University after completing my generals at the community college.

But, ya want to know what’s extremely stupid?

I am not eligible for using financial aid since I’m using the transfer curriculum.  

Now I’m not any financial aid whiz, nor claim to be one.  I’m sure maybe there’s some sort of valid reason for this out there but quite frankly it’s ridiculous.

Yes, community college is cheaper but still not AFFORDABLE by any means.  I’m going only part time and my cost for one semester is almost $2,000 + books costing around $300.  

I am a single mother, working a $7.25/hr job for 25Hrs or less a week (which will be less when I start school mind you).  I only just GOT this job 2 weeks ago.

Now mr.school, or mrs., how do YOU expect me to pay for my schooling when YOU won’t take any financial aid?  Student loans?  Oh I thought you’d say that.  But that means taking out about $20,000 (roughly) in loans.  

I don’t mind taking out loans if my financial aid doesn’t cover my schooling.  Not at all.  But when you’re in a sense ‘punishing’ me for not getting a degree at your school, and prohibiting me from using financial aid.  Yes, I have a problem.  Not to mention I can’t even APPLY for a student loan until I’m 18 which is just a MONTH before school starts and even less for when the tuition is DUE for god sakes.  

WHY, can I ask you, is college so DAMN EXPENSIVE?  It’s complete crap.  Complete and total crap.  I better be getting my estimated pay for my job that I’m seeking with my degree.  Otherwise I will be drowning and living at home when I’m 40.  And let’s be honest, who wants that?  No one.  I’d like to be a productive member of society Ms.United States.  I know you want me to be too.  So why are you making it so difficult for me to do that?  I REFUSE to be another teenage parent statistic never getting out of poverty.  But you Ms.United States education system are really screwing me over in that department.  

Now I really understand why other countries express how messed up our education system is.  

That’s all.  Thank you.

One irritated, about to be even more piss poor, and drowning in debt U.S. Citizen,

PE

College Shopping!

Quite frankly the idea of college shopping is so exciting but really nerve wracking to me.  I don’t know what I need or don’t need and I don’t want to waste any money!  I have a small list going on right now.  Just basic stuff, notebooks, folders, file folders, file box, new gel pens, pencils, erasers, stapler, more clips for paper, a nice tote bag, a workout bag (for the days I workout at school as well as go to class), etc.  Other than that I’m pretty lost.  I really can’t wait to go shopping though!

It’s Graduation Day!

The day has finally come and it’s graduation day!  

I had college registration at 9 a.m. which went alright.  (Side note: I bumped into an old friend at registration which was nice!  I’m pretty proud of myself too because normally I’m extremely shy and don’t like going to places I haven’t really been alone for the first time but I did!) I’m actually kind of excited because a lot of the classes I can take for generals are also associated with my degree I am going for.  For anyone who doesn’t know, I’m going to my community college for general ed and then transferring to the University for Dietetics.  Lots of science classes!

I’m also excited that my college just got a new wellness center and the exercise area is included in your tuition so I think Monday’s are going to be my cardio days because I have class from 8-10 a.m. and then I don’t have another class till Noon.  So that will be nice!  Plus who doesn’t like having an excuse to wear fitness clothes 😉

Now I can officially go school shopping when college season starts and know what I’m looking for!  Score! (I love school shopping).

You won’t ever know what you can achieve without taking the first step,

PE